It takes courage. And you have courage and resiliency written naturally into your DNA. The only way to change what hurts you emotionally is to invite it to your awareness and confront it dead on. I call this ‘turning a cold eye’ on it which could be defined as an inner gaze that is fixed, direct, and neutral. Before I write the next sentence I will wait a moment while you roll your eyes, curse, or otherwise disparage me or whatever else you would prefer to do to lash out and assign responsibility elsewhere for the pain you have this very moment. I completely understand because I used to do that a lot. Sometimes I still do.I am after all, a person on the planet along side you.And just like you, I was baptized quite heavily in the requisite font of emotional suffering in order to become a ‘good person’ much to the approval of my family, community, and society. You see, in order to fit here, we are all asked to join in emotional suffering.
Please return to the paragraph above if you are triggered by what comes next. I totally get it.
I have no judgement that you think you are not ready to read, much less do, the following. There was a time when I was not ready too. But here is what I know beyond any doubt: You are ready or you would not be reading this. And you are exquisitely capable of releasing your emotional suffering, in fact, you have significant assistance to do so right at this very moment you are reading these words. As you read this, help in the form of your Higher Self in all of its expressions, is observing you and awaiting your free-will choice to engage. It is YOU who can transmute and release your emotional pain and suffering. And that is what makes something innate to you so tricky because we are programmed here to look for outside resources to recover ourselves. Here is what I want you to know today…
When you arrived on this gorgeous planet, you were told in numerous ways over and over that the best way to deal with personal emotional pain was to pretend you did not have it. And as with most things you practiced over time, you became excellent at pretending. The only problem with this approach is that pain of any nature that is left in the hinter lands of your awareness, will powerfully run your life every single day. Just because you are not looking at the pain does not make it disappear. It is a toddler’s limitation to think that which is no longer seen no longer exists. Emotional pain left unaddressed will destroy both your mind and body, rendering your soul, without judgment, grateful to exit. Most of all, you will never realize how amazingly beautiful life on Earth can be and why WE are the envy of the cosmos given our embodied status as souls.
Inviting your emotional pain into your awareness in order to heal takes dedicated time and effort and gets easier the more you do it. And be advised: The people in your life today may not be there tomorrow when you begin to heal. You see, they attracted you into their lives for their own need to heal too. Some of them will want you to be just as you always were.Send them love and let them go.
The process, for me, looks something like this:
- Decide that you have had enough emotional pain
- Forget that you decided you had enough and have some more painful experiences
- Go back to number one and this time write about it, tell someone you trust, seek a counselor, pray for guidance, meditate to connect more deeply with your true Self, find and engage with others healing from it, and/or create your own healing ritual of any kind whatsoever around it
- Discover that most of all, SELF LOVE is required and know you were taught loving yourself was wrong so this will take time and practice too*
- Repeat because attending to and releasing what has, for human beings, become an addiction in its own right requires this level of maintenance
- Create a daily routine for self-support inviting only that which is in your Highest Good and releasing that which does not belong to you, back to Source, whatever those two aspects appear to be for you*
*Tip: once you have 4 & 6 down, change comes more quickly and with more ease